*Trained in all mascot-related issues including, but not limited to, existential dread, identity crises & FOMO
Feeling a certain way about NJM Insurance’s “No Jingles or Mascots” campaign? You’re not alone. More than ever, mascots of all shapes, sizes, and species are searching for a sense of purpose. Thankfully, I’m here to help you cope with the fact that great insurance speaks for itself. The first step is getting a quote from NJM today (commonly referred to as exposure therapy).Get a Quote Today
After receiving very important degrees from the University of Scientific Study + College of Health Sciences, I’ve dedicated my life to the emotional well-being of mascots. I currently specialize in the treatment of Insurance-Induced Phobias, Fuzzy Anxiety Syndrome, and other serious mascot matters.
Ranked #1 by Insurance Mascot Therapy Digest.
“I was feeling so empty inside, but Dr. Schmoctor helped me get my head on straight.”
“I’m hopeful Dr. Schmoctor can make me feel like a big fish in a little pond again.”
“Dr. Schmoctor is amazing. She gave me the courage I needed to spread my wings and fly.”
Using my proprietary Schmoctor Method™, this award-winning self-help guide delivers the groundbreaking insights that have encouraged mascots just like you to find their happy place underneath those layers of sweaty fabric.
If you know other mascots who are struggling with insurance-related issues, share my services so they can schedule a consultation.
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